For those of us leading Christian lifestyles, how is BDSM different? Certainly, God has given us certain boundaries for sex and love that others in the BDSM community do not follow... so how do we remain members of this kinky community, without falling into sin?
First, a lot of people couldn't imagine a Christian being into BDSM. Christians have an image as goodie-goodies who never enjoy sex. But we Christians are as diverse as any other group, so of course some of us are into some rough play, rape fantasies, and dirty talk! Is God okay with this? Well, you have to ask Him for yourself... but in my opinion, yes!
I have found several great Christians focused on pleasing God in the BDSM community. I've met people from all across the Christian denominations, from devout Catholics to Southern Baptist preachers and everything in between. These people are struggling to find a balance between their relationship with God and their kinky desires.
Of course, God gives us some boundaries for sex through His Word. We should stay away from sex outside of marriage. This includes premarital sex, solo masturbation, orgies, and threesomes. We know this isn't because God hates sex and doesn't want us to have fun, but because He is so invested in giving His people a sacred and special sex life, He wants us to save it for just one special partner in a monogamous marriage! Within His perimeters, we find sex lives full of sacred spirituality and eternal worth, and are richly blessed!
The New Testament also is clear that we should abstain from sexual contact with the same sex, with animals, or with children. In Matthew 5:18, Jesus tells us to even save our thoughts for our spouse; we shouldn't fantasize. So clearly, we shouldn't engage in BDSM where we talk about others watching, fantasize about having a threesome or orgy, or pretend our spouse is someone else.
Basically, all these ideas stem from the idea of keeping sexuality sacred for your God-given marriage partner, the person with whom you will be One Flesh. Of course, masturbating, including animals or other people, watching porn, and reading erotica are all sexual experiences that aren't shared with your spouse, so you should probably avoid them. Many BDSM parties hosted by non-Christians will allow kinksters to "play" in public; as far as I can tell, watching or performing is just live porn, and allows others into your sacred sex life intended for two.
Is God okay with BDSM? I think so. The Old Testament is full of examples of God telling His people how to treat their slaves and servants right! He even describes how many times to beat them for certain offenses. New Testament authors Paul and Peter both stress the importance of a woman submitting to her husband...and what is BDSM but the submission of your most private, intimate self?
Other than these few guidelines, sex within Christian marriage is an open playground ready for exploration! There is so much we as Christians can do! As long as we both agree... it's fair game! You can scream, fight, enact rape fantasies or interrogation scenes, hit, beat, whip, punish, spank, and paddle your spouse. You can yank his hair, torture his cock, tie him up and gag him. You can make her beg, make her cry, make her scream in pain, and laugh wickedly because you're enjoying it! You can twist her nipples, fuck her ass, and shove a dildo covered in Tiger Balm into her pussy and watch her scream and arch her back in pain. You can play with vibrators, dildos, cock rings, bondage gear, piercings, hot wax, asphyxiation, and butt plugs together. You can write each other dirty erotica, have steamy phone sex, video and photograph your own personal porn collection of yourselves, and have conversations that make you both horny and wet. You can have sex in the bathroom of a bar, force her to cum and then lick it up, write dirty names all over her in permanent marker, and humiliate her til she cries. You can boss him around, slap him, jam a dildo up his ass and call him a homo for liking it. Basically, be as dirty as you want... just make sure sex includes the two of you, no more and no less!
Being Christian doesn't mean you have to be boring. You can still be into kink and BDSM on Saturday night, and pray demurely in church on Sunday morning. Of course, we need to be careful our play is consensual and following holy guidelines, but as long as you are...
First, a lot of people couldn't imagine a Christian being into BDSM. Christians have an image as goodie-goodies who never enjoy sex. But we Christians are as diverse as any other group, so of course some of us are into some rough play, rape fantasies, and dirty talk! Is God okay with this? Well, you have to ask Him for yourself... but in my opinion, yes!
I have found several great Christians focused on pleasing God in the BDSM community. I've met people from all across the Christian denominations, from devout Catholics to Southern Baptist preachers and everything in between. These people are struggling to find a balance between their relationship with God and their kinky desires.
Of course, God gives us some boundaries for sex through His Word. We should stay away from sex outside of marriage. This includes premarital sex, solo masturbation, orgies, and threesomes. We know this isn't because God hates sex and doesn't want us to have fun, but because He is so invested in giving His people a sacred and special sex life, He wants us to save it for just one special partner in a monogamous marriage! Within His perimeters, we find sex lives full of sacred spirituality and eternal worth, and are richly blessed!
The New Testament also is clear that we should abstain from sexual contact with the same sex, with animals, or with children. In Matthew 5:18, Jesus tells us to even save our thoughts for our spouse; we shouldn't fantasize. So clearly, we shouldn't engage in BDSM where we talk about others watching, fantasize about having a threesome or orgy, or pretend our spouse is someone else.
Basically, all these ideas stem from the idea of keeping sexuality sacred for your God-given marriage partner, the person with whom you will be One Flesh. Of course, masturbating, including animals or other people, watching porn, and reading erotica are all sexual experiences that aren't shared with your spouse, so you should probably avoid them. Many BDSM parties hosted by non-Christians will allow kinksters to "play" in public; as far as I can tell, watching or performing is just live porn, and allows others into your sacred sex life intended for two.
Is God okay with BDSM? I think so. The Old Testament is full of examples of God telling His people how to treat their slaves and servants right! He even describes how many times to beat them for certain offenses. New Testament authors Paul and Peter both stress the importance of a woman submitting to her husband...and what is BDSM but the submission of your most private, intimate self?
Other than these few guidelines, sex within Christian marriage is an open playground ready for exploration! There is so much we as Christians can do! As long as we both agree... it's fair game! You can scream, fight, enact rape fantasies or interrogation scenes, hit, beat, whip, punish, spank, and paddle your spouse. You can yank his hair, torture his cock, tie him up and gag him. You can make her beg, make her cry, make her scream in pain, and laugh wickedly because you're enjoying it! You can twist her nipples, fuck her ass, and shove a dildo covered in Tiger Balm into her pussy and watch her scream and arch her back in pain. You can play with vibrators, dildos, cock rings, bondage gear, piercings, hot wax, asphyxiation, and butt plugs together. You can write each other dirty erotica, have steamy phone sex, video and photograph your own personal porn collection of yourselves, and have conversations that make you both horny and wet. You can have sex in the bathroom of a bar, force her to cum and then lick it up, write dirty names all over her in permanent marker, and humiliate her til she cries. You can boss him around, slap him, jam a dildo up his ass and call him a homo for liking it. Basically, be as dirty as you want... just make sure sex includes the two of you, no more and no less!
Being Christian doesn't mean you have to be boring. You can still be into kink and BDSM on Saturday night, and pray demurely in church on Sunday morning. Of course, we need to be careful our play is consensual and following holy guidelines, but as long as you are...
And if a man smite his servant, or his maid, with a rod, and he die under his
hand; he shall be surely punished. Notwithstanding, if he continue a day or two,
he shall not be punished: for he is his property. -Exodus 21:20-21
2 comments:
The Bible says not to do sodomy though.
Yes, I have often wondered if that was just referring to "sodomy meaning 'how gay people have sex'" or if straight anal play would be included, too. Thoughts?
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