As the Dom it is my responsibility to come up with new ways to inflict pain to cause pleasure. This can be a difficult task, but I promise through communication and practice a good solution will be found. The Dom/sub relationship is one I believe to be unique for every couple. One couple may be into something more corporal and the other may enjoy something more emotional. My goal today is to give food for thought and encouragement. Try something new!
Emotional
This is the type of pain I feel many neglect, but is very rewarding. I know this is my sub's favorite. Emotional pain not only turns the sub on, but also they know they're 100% safe. Refer our lessons in dirty talk to better understand how this is implemented. When I cause emotional pain through what I say I am turned on, too. It makes me feel powerful and creative. If your partner is into this, the feedback you receive will blow your mind!
Striking
This is a very common form of pain and even the most reserved couples will enjoy a good spanking during sex. I can attest that this is my favorite. I feel physically dominant because of the posture during sex. I also feel physically powerful after giving my sub a good slap. The look she gives me after is amazing! I feel an adrenaline rush, excitment, and turned on all at the same time. I stick with open-handed strikes. I like the popping sound and it doesn't hurt or bruise. Slapping doesn't have to be only for the face. Try slapping your sub's thighs, feet, and chest (be careful of the breasts if your sub is female). Some will enjoy a closed-fisted punch. Go for it, but be careful. A friend of mine told me the most turned on he ever was was when his partner gave him a right cross during sex. To each their own!
Cutting
Cutting is another way to cause pain to your sub. I have never done this, but I know this play is out there. Sterile surgical tools can be used to cut your sub, or needles for needle play. Pain is caused and your sub is marked at the same time. It kills two birds with one stone. It is very, very dangerous due to the risk of extreme blood loss and infection. If you choose this avenue be careful. Have a charged cell phone with service to call 9-1-1 and bandages handy. Uses your safewords/safeactions at the first sign of trouble!
Burning
This method can be achieved in two different methods; permanent and non-permanent. The permanent form would be those interested in branding their sub. This is another way to mark the sub as your own. Much like cutting, be sure your tools are sterile! The risk here is infection. It only takes a nasty one to be fatal. The non-permanent version is using hot wax or wet a towel and put it in the microwave. There are many options here. The point is to have fun and stay safe.
Electro Play
This involves shocking your sub into delight. Remember that anytime you play with electricity can be very dangerous. It can cause burns, sears, and cardiac arrest. Many people enjoy this play in spite of the risks. Some of the more popular tools are the violet wand, cattle prods, and stun guns. I can understand why the subs like this so much. I have been shocked before either by an electric fence or outlets. I know being shocked hurts and renders the victim helpless. If one was turned on my a violent loss of control this would be the way.
There is a quick overview of the types of pain that may be inflicted on your sub. Remember to talk to your partner before trying something new. Make sure they are willing and you do your homework to understand the risks. The rewards may be beyond what you expect!
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