The Eden's Fantasy Dilemma, or Why I'm Through

All right, I'm blogging about it.

Although I mostly read and subscribe to D/s blogs, these overlap enough with the "sex blogger community" (I think that would include BDSM, but those in the group write about mostly sexual health and toy reviews) that I noticed when the whole blogger community got in an uproar this May about Eden's Fantasy.

Just before the big fiascos came out, I signed up to be an Eden's Fantasy (EF) reviewer. The name Sexperts was taken (sad face), so I couldn't sign up under that name, but I did a few free reviews for them. Ultimately, I was hoping to receive toy reviews and get more involved in the EF community, which is substantial. There are blogs, forums, reviews, messaging, and more.

There will always be bloggers screaming about how they were mistreated, and if it were just one or maybe two bloggers, I'd probably ignore it.

The thing is, though, many prominent members of the sex blogging community have written openly about their issues with EF and its leadership. Finally, this thing got so big I also felt I needed to write about it.

Essin' Em has written about her issues with EF when she was employed by them. She was unhappy with EF for backing out of a Sex Bloggers Calendar, for sharing some bloggers' public information on the web (!!) and then not taking responsibility for it, and then for allegedly lying and saying they never had a Google doc spreadsheet of the bloggers' contact info. Fred, the owner of EF, wrote a rebuttal about the Google doc spreadsheet incident here.

AAG also worked for EF and was fired, which was not her issue with the company. Her issue is that she has not been reimbursed for the final week of work she did before leaving the company. Of course any boss has the right to fire an employee, but not to withhold pay simply because he was unhappy with the work prior to firing.

Epiphora has recently been blocked from the EF community without being given warnings or specifics as to what she did wrong. In my opinion, the worst part is that EF then wrote a public announcement about this to humiliate her, then later wrote that since she didn't try to appeal but only wrote about it on her blog, they stood by their decision. Well, her original notice said the decision was "final." And they are mad because she didn't appeal?! Very high school.

After the to-do about Epiphora being blocked, Just Your Average Guy wrote a public post saying he was disappointed in EF and would be leaving. As you can read in the comments, an administrator temporarily locked his account for a "cooling-off" period because he had been "spamming."

Curvaceous Dee is unhappy with EF because they accidentally made public some bloggers' private information, including her real name.

That Sex Toy Chick has, without naming EF, made it clear that "a company" she disagrees with is the same company AAG and Essin' Em wrote about. She was forced to file with the state to be awarded money that was owed her. The owner of EF, Fred, also stopped her from creating a new sex toy called ChillDils by accusing her of copyright infringement, but did not give her proof of copyright when requested. She says EF is now selling their product again, after years of it being dormant, right when she was ready to start her own Chilldils. I don't know the name of the product, so I cannot verify that.

Maybe Maimed But Never Harmed by MayMay wrote a popular article called "EF's unethical technology is a self-referential black hole." This author had discovered that EF's links to their reviewer and bloggers' websites were actually not giving traffic to these sites. In other words, they're lying to and screwing over their community. According to Women's Tribune, an initial inquiry about it on the EF forum was deleted (you'll have to enlarge the screen shot), but another forum discussion opened by a community member asking about it. A staff member, Victoria, said the post was deleted because the staff had already gone home for the day and they have now talked it out and addressed the issue. Fred (I feel like I know him already!) wrote an explanation of EF's linking practices. Furthermore, after reading Fred's explanation, MayMay said it makes no sense, and said, and I quote, "I call bullshit on Eden Fantasy's response."

The author of Women's Tribune made a post on the EF forum that the explanation did not make sense, and her post was deleted and then she was blocked (read her story for details). Mistress Kay was also blocked from EF for similar posts.

Maria wrote on the EF forum and said she was unhappy with EF, can't trust the company, and is leaving. Aside from the aforementioned drama, she is unhappy because EF divides its toys by male and female, and even gay and straight, which is both confusing and politically incorrect. After many months, EF still had not changed the toy categories. The owner of EF, Fred, wrote her a comment defending the company and saying he invited this discussion on the open forum. He says the problem is being fixed.

Epiphora also wrote a great post about many people who worked or reviewed for EF and shared their bad experiences with her anonymously. I'd recommend reading them before you make a decision.

The sex blogging community is rallying in support, including posts by:

Sexy by Sarah

The Smack Dog Chronicles

Ask Garnet (this is where I first heard about it all!)

Julietta

Carnivalesq

Feminina Deliciosa

Hello Saraid

At a Kinky House

Heartbreak Nymphomania

and honestly, so many more I'm tired of typing them out. lol.

For a list of all the links that have to do with Eden's Fantasy, check out Britni's site. You can get some great info there, and if you're new to this whole debacle it's a great place to start sorting out the truth and the madness.

So, I guess that's it. I won't be buying from EF anymore, or writing reviews for them, or being part of their community at all. I feel beholden to support my fellow sex bloggers, especially these women who are putting their hearts and souls into making the online sex community a more wholesome, healthy place. Babeland and Good Vibrations are still awesome, and I'm always in the market for more cool stores that are sex-positive, friendly, and not full of porn and sleaze.

At first glance, EF really seemed more like Babeland and Good Vibrations, but after soooo many bloggers are decrying them, I feel like there's something wrong there. There could be a good reason for one blogger to boycott them, or maybe two, but not these dozens of people whose names I know. So add me to the list of sex bloggers boycotting EF. I'm sure they won't even miss me. And hey, if you decide to boycott them too, please let me know in one of your comments or with a link back here!

Sex Toy Pricing

Okay, so my readers like to buy sex toys, but they want to know where to get the cheapest ones.

Well, here's your answer! I spent this morning perusing my favorite sex toy websites, comparing prices on the two most popular sex toys ever: The Hitachi Magic Wand and the We Vibe. The Hitachi has been around forever and is the quintessential vibrator for women. The We Vibe, on the other hand, is new and immensely popular. It provides women with both internal and external stimulation, and can be worn during sex. Wow!

Needless to say, I don't own either of these, but I'm aching to.

Here are how the prices break down on these two vibrators:

Good Vibrations:

1. Hitachi Wand: $52
2. We Vibe: $130

Babeland:

1. Hitachi Wand: $54
2. We Vibe: $130

Eden's Fantasy:

1. Hitachi Wand: $45.99
2. We Vibe:$130

My Pleasure:

1. Hitachi: $74.95
2. We Vibe: not available

Sensual Sutra:

1. Hitachi: $64.95
2. We Vibe: not available, but the We Vibe II is sold for $149.99, on sale now for $79.99

Healthy and Active:

1. Hitachi Wand: $39.95
2. We Vibe: Regular $129.99, on sale now for $73.95

Amazon.com:

1. Hitachi Wand: Normally $60, on sale now for $39.95
2. We Vibe: Normally $130, on sale now for $75.94

Holiday Savings for Online Sex Toys

It's the holiday season, and as Thanksgiving comes and goes, the Christmas season and subsequent shopping spree will begin.



Did you know that sex toys are becoming one of the most popular gifts this year? It's true! Right around the time the economy started to fall, lipstick and sex toy sales went way up---people started buying small, economical gifts for themselves and their loved ones that they could enjoy without burning a hole in their pocket. And while sex toys are usually more expensive than lipstick, these gifts can help you create a date night where you and your loved one stay in to celebrate the holidays and go easy on your wallet.



I've been checking out sex toy and fetish websites, scouring the web for good holiday deals for my readers. Here's what I've found.



As always, I started with Babeland and Good Vibrations, because these are two stores I've worked with a lot in the past and I true. I like how both these stores are women-friendly, sex-positive stores that focus on quality products and sex education, not sleazy pornographic pictures and sky-high prices. These stores are friendly to all types: straight or gay, Christian or not, woman or man. They also have a great selection of all sorts of lubes and sex toys, although their BDSM and bondage section is pretty small, and both stores have good customer service and discreet shipping every time I use them.



Once I'd checked out the holiday deals at those stores, I checked some other stores I've used. Some were having holiday sales; some weren't. I also found some new sites that are offering holiday deals or have a particularly low price for some top-selling toys I think my readers might be interested in, such as the Hitachi Wand (the most popular sex toy ever, as far as I can tell) or the We Vibe, a new luxury toy meant to be worn during intercourse (I want it! I want it! I want it!).



Here's what I found. None of these stores has asked me to do this and I'm not getting any sort of compensation for these reviews; this is all just information I found that I wanted to share with my readers as the holidays begin.

• Babeland is having several holiday specials. Their Black Friday Extravaganza is going on from now til 11/30, and you get a free vibrator + free shipping if you buy anything over $70. From now til Christmas, you can have free shipping on any orders of $50 or more (that's one good sex toy, so it's worth it), and if you own a blog you can also write a short post about one of their Objects of Desire that you want for Christmas (or any other holiday!) and enter a drawing. The winner will be picked on Christmas day and will receive $1,000 worth of sex toys from the store, so if you like sex toys, you might as well enter and test your luck.


• Good Vibrations isn't having any holiday specials (yet) that I've found, but they do offer a $5-0ff coupon if you sign up for the email newsletters. This store also has a wider selection of BDSM, fetish, and bondage toys than Babeland, including several good books and some toys not only intended for beginners.


• Eden's Fantasy is having holiday sales, including free shipping on orders over $59. They're also offering 35% off California Exotic Rabbits and 50% off on some selected toys. For cute stocking stuffers, they also have some cheap vibes and toys for under $10 on their Sale page. This store passed the important "Anal Lube Test" (meaning, like Babeland and Good Vibes, they don't sell desensitizing anal lubricants, which are dangerous for customers and indicate a store cares more about making a buck than customer safety), and Eden's Fantasy also has a decent bondage and fetish collection for sale.


• I was really pleased to discover the online store My Pleasure. This store's webpage is neat, tidy, and classy. There are no pornographic images and customers can feel good about purchasing there. My Pleasure has an education section with loads of information about sex, toys, lubricants, and more; they also pass the Anal Lube Test. They're also having a holiday sale on several vibrators, dildos, costumes, lingerie, and other items. During the week of Thanksgiving, you can get 10% off all purchases, 15% off purchases of $75 or more, and 20% off purchases of $125 or more.


• Xtreme Restraints is, in my opinion, not a classy, customer-friendly sex store. I really hate the online stores that show pornographic ads and seem to think sex is a dirty secret to make money on rather than a special bonding experience between two adults. Not surprisingly, they failed the Anal Lube Test. However, I felt this store was worth mentioning because it offers a wide array of BDSM toys and gear for everyone from total beginners to Masters with years of experience. Whether you want medical gear, fetish wear, costumes, head gear, chastity devices, enema supplies, mouth gags, or serious bondage equipment, this store offers it. Xtreme Restraints is also having a holiday sale and is offering free shipping on orders more than $69.


• Sensual Sutra is another site I found that passed the Anal Lube Test and is classy and positive about sexuality. On the other hand, you can tell a lot about a store by their lubricant section, and I noticed this store didn't have a lot of quality lube (except the standards Eros and Astroglide that you find everywhere) but had a lot of flavored and sugary lubes that seemed more fit for a teenager's chapstick flavors than an adult's lubricant. This store has a few restraint items (mostly different types of handcuffs) and no big holiday product sales that I could find, although they are offering free shipping on orders more than $89.

While perusing these sites, I never found one that sold my favorite vibrator of all time, the Rabbit G, sold by Adult Toy Shoppe (that store, unfortunately, has not posted any holiday sales). If you can't decide what toy to get your loved one, I highly, highly recommend this one. Basically, it's fantastic--so fantastic I broke mine. (Oops.) Still, I use it even broken, and I long for the day I can afford a new one. This baby might be expensive, but it's well worth it--I've tried a plethora of dildos and vibrators in my time, and even other rabbit vibes, but nothing else even comes close.

Anyway, as Thanksgiving draws near, have a happy and safe holiday and start thinking about what to buy for Christmas gifts! :)

20% off Babeland Sale

Buzzzzz your way to a new America.

Go to Babeland's 2-day Inaguration Day Sale!

20% off select Red, White, and Blue sex products!

Review: Ella

Ella is a two-ended dildo made by the luxury pleasure object company, Lelo. Lelo, a European company whose motto is "Lelo: lust objectified," manufactures high-end, luxury sex toys known for their superb quality and name brand. Since Lelo offers high-quality products ranging from $50 to $1,600, I was understandably thrilled when I discovered I would get the opportunity to review a much-coveted Lelo product!

Ella is Lelo's only dildo, and I had heard great reviews on other sex educators' websites. Frankly, I couldn't wait to try it!

I have loved working with Lelo for reviewing Ella. The customer service representative always answered my emails within a few days and was super friendly and polite. They were as thrilled to have my business as I was to try their product!

From the moment you enter the Lelo site, you can tell this company is a far cry from the seedy, pornography-inspired sex sites you often find on the internet. Rather than selling a huge number of sleazy, low-cost items seen in porn and many sex shops, Lelo offers a small array of high-end, class sexual toys, each one of highest quality and with a one-year guarantee. Some of their pleasure objects even come in steel or gold plating! This is luxury objectified. The website is classy, elegant, and refined; it is available in multiple languages and simple to navigate. Prices are given in euros, but a quick "euro to [dollar]" search on Google gives the amount in other currencies with the single click of a button.

Needless to say, I was beyond excited when I found out I was getting a Lelo product of my very own. Thanks to UPS's wonderful package tracking service online, I eagerly followed my package's progress from China, through Korea, through Poland and Germany, and eventually, to my residence in France.

Opening the package, I was not disappointed. Ella came in a classy box that far surpassed the plastic wrapping of other sites. She came with her own instruction manual (in multiple languages) and a chic satin pouch for travel. With the dildo itself I was not disappointed. Ella was small, thin, and sleek. While she comes in black, white, and deep rose, mine was deep black. Her exterior felt smooth and soft to my hand, and was obviously made from high-quality materials.

So would I recommend Ella? Absolutely. I am not as big a fan of dildos as I am of vibrators, but Ella is a fantastic dildo. First and foremost, she is double-ended, meaning you are really receiving two dildos for the price of one. One end is tapered almost to a rounded point, useful for tradition penetration, and the other is curved to perfectly stimulate the G-spot, which it absolutely does.

For all practical purposes, I found Ella easy to use. Both ends were easy to grip, providing a slip-free surface as I enjoyed two different sensations, one after the other. Ella fit inside comfortably, and the G-spot stimulation was direct and intense. I could even use her without lubricant, although after a while the hard in-and-out motions made me sore and I needed lube. The only minor problem I had with Ella was, during traditional penetration, the tapered end comes almost to a rounded point, which was painful when pushed all the way in and out, hitting my cervix. I wouldn't recommend trying to reach record depths with a dildo that has a point--even a rounded one.

While Ella is a great addition to anyone's collection, I would especially recommend her for beginners, as her sleek size and thin shape are ideal for those beginning the wonderful world of dildos. For men wanting to treat your special lady to a luxurious treat, this is the toy for you! Best of all, Ella comes at a fantastic price: 34 euros (about 46 US dollars), which is a great bargain and well worth it to become the proud owner of a fashionable Lelo product!

For more information on Ella and other fantastic Lelo products for both men and women, please visit the Lelo website. I assure you this company's products will be worth the cost. In fact, Lelo is even offering free shipping on all products until January 7, 2009. Enjoy, and go pamper yourself!

*Note: all photos used here are the property of Lelo.

Lubricants

Did you know some lubes are dangerous for your health, can cause yeast infections, and can cause condoms to break? So how do you know which ones to use?

First, there are two types of lube you should never buy: anal desensitizing lube, and lubes with Nonoxynol-9 (N-9). There are many sex toy stores that sell these lubes, and you should never purchase from these stores. Anal desensitizing lube can cause real internal damage by numbing you to pain intended to warn you something is wrong. Lubes with N-9 claim to help prevent against pregnancy and HIV, but actually increase the risk of HIV and STDS by creating tiny tears and abrasions inside the vagina and anus. Some good stores that don't sell these lubes and care about their customer's health are Babeland and Good Vibrations.

There are three main types of lubricants: water-based, oil-based, and silicone-based.

Water-based lubes are thinner, safe for your body, and easy to clean afterwards. They are safe to use with condoms and other latex products, as well as with sex toys. Sometimes, however, they can be too thin and dry out too soon for anal play.

Oil-based lubes aren't safe to use with condoms or latex. Oils can also disrupt the amount of healthy bacteria in the vagina, causing infections.

Silicone-based lubes feel more like oil, but are safer for your body. You can use them safely internally, and they tend to be thicker and longer-lasting, so better for anal play. You can't use them with your silicone sex toys, though, or the chemicals will react and melt your toy! Also, these can be harder to wash out afterwards.

Sweet or flavored lubes often have their fruity, sweet taste because they contain glycerin. This sugary lube can cause yeast infections in some women, since sugar disrupts the balance of healthy vaginal yeast. So women, be wary of sweet-tasting or fruity lubes!

Also, "do-it-yourself" lubricants are usually not a good idea; stick to water- or silicone-based lubricants from a store. Crisco, baby oil, hemorroid cream, vaseline, and other over-the-counter oils may seem like a good idea because they feel slick, but the oil inside will cause your condoms to fail, and can cause infections when used vaginally. They are also really hard to clean out afterward. Spit dries out too fast and leaves your skin even drier than before.

If you self-lubricate a lot during vaginal intercourse; congratulations! Stick with a thick lube (like Maximus) for anal and you will be set. If you need vaginal lubrication, too, you might want to buy a thinner lube as well, or consider buying a lube sampler from Babeland.

Be safe!

Babeland Holiday Specials!

Want to win a $1000-dollar date night for two? Just sign up for a Babeland newsletter online by going to Babeland and signing up for Babeland Briefs (newsletters sent to your email). No purchase necessary. :)

The contest goes til February 28, 2009. If your name is drawn, you win:
One night at a sexy hotel in your city• Private Babeland tour and Babeland shopping spree worth $250• Dinner at a romantic restaurant • Two tickets to local live entertainment• Wine, chocolate and flowers

Babeland right now is featuring an article, "How to Choose a Sex Toy Gift." If you have no idea where to even start with sex toys (either for yourself or a friend!), this article is great for you!

Also, Babeland has free shipping on orders over $99 til December 19!!!

Happy Holidays! :)

Why Not to Shop at Cybernooky.com

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Our Review Criterions

When we review set toy stores, and not just the sex products themselves, there are several things we consider. To better understand how and why we arrive to our conclusions, here are the ethical, professional, and quality criterions we take into account for each business:

1. Anal Lube Test
2. Atmosphere
3. Site Design
4. Site Professionalism
5. Toy Variety
6. Products
7. Customer Service: speed of reply
8. Customer Service: friendliness and politeness
9. Informational Articles

For a more complete description of each, keep reading below...

Anal Lube Test: The #1 way to know if a store cares about its customers, or is exploiting sex to make a buck, is to look in the lube section. Do they have a desensitizing anal lubricant? Don't purchase from that store. Anal pain is how your body warns you serious damage is about to occur. A company that sells you something it knows will hurt you is not to be trusted. It is probable that their products are of lower quality and less safe materials, because this store is interested in making money, not offering quality, safe sexual products.

Atmosphere: Is the site upscale or sleazy? There are stores that treat sex as a joyful celebration, and stores that view sex as a sleazy, dirty moneymaker. We want to make sure you avoid the bad kind and stick to the good!

Site Design: How user-friendly is the site?

Site Professionalism: Does the site suffer from bad grammar, obvious typos, and spelling errors? If a company hasn't put the effort in to make a professional site, you can bet they won't put the effort in to provide you with quality care or products. Sloppy work on sites means sloppy work everywhere.

Toy Variety: What kind of toys do they offer? Does each category offer many different choices?

Products: Is this site offering top-quality products, or simply cheap knock-offs at a jacked-up rate?

Customer Service: speed of reply. Email takes seconds to read and reply. Companies who can't be bothered responding to customer concerns show a blatant lack of care for their customers. We want you to work with a company where you are seen as a human being, not a wallet! Also, companies who simply never deign to respond show a severe lack of decorum, manners, and politeness.

Customer Service: friendliness and politeness: Are responses polite, friendly, and eager to ensure customer satisfaction? If not, look somewhere else!

Informational Articles: Companies that care about their customers often include great informational articles about sex, sex education, tips, product help, buyer's guides, and more. These sites show they genuinely want their customers to lead sexually healthy lives. Sites that just sell toys often want you to buy their product, pay, and leave them alone.

Review: The Hummingbird

The Hummingbird from Babeland Toys (also called the Clit Hummer) is a waterproof vibe made of hard plastic. Babeland sells it for $20, and other sites for a little more.

I'll start with the positive reviews first. I was really excited to get this toy! The site says the cupped side can be used to "cradle the clit" and the nub to "pinpoint pleasure." It sounded like a fantastic idea! Also, this vibe, which runs on 2 AA batteries, has a super smooth vibration with a really varied range of speeds; I love this feature. It is great to go from a gentle whisper to a powerful shake, and this toy has that versatility. Also, it is super quiet! Even on its highest settings, the vibration stays smooth and the noise level is a gentle hum. It's also waterproof and easy to clean.

On the negative side, this vibe didn't do for me what it was supposed to: deliver consistent orgasms. I was disappointed that the "clit cradle" experience was actually just rather ho-hum (pun intended). Of course, different vibes work for different women, but this just didn't work for me. Sometimes I would enjoy the sensation, and sometimes I just would lie there waiting and staring at the ceiling, but I rarely orgasmed. I do feel it fair to mention that this vibe did give me one amazing orgasm. I'm not sure what was different that day (alignment of the stars? I was more turned on?), but out of nowhere, the low vibrations began to turn me on, and when I turned it up to high, I was immediately shaken by an earth-shattering, long-lasting O. It was hot! However, after several weeks of play sessions, that one lone O remains an isolated event I have been unable to replicate. In fact, usually playing with this toy is pretty blah. Sometimes I get turned on, but for such a genius design idea, I am often left wondering what I'm doing wrong.

Now, today as I prepared for my review, I was browsing photos and other reviews. Since I'd assumed the nub was for clit play, I'd been using it that way and was unimpressed. So you can imagine I was surprised to learn it is also made for the G-spot. I gamely tried it out, and again got so-so results. First, this vibe is hard. It is not made for comfortable insertion. I used lube, relaxed, breathed slowly, and proceeded carefully. Needless to say, the hard plastic and funky shape aren't really made for vaginal insertion, and I would never recommend it for fucking. It reminded me a lot of a trip to the ob-gyn, and not in a good way.

Once inside, I found the large shape and strong vibe pleasurable. I experimented with different positions, trying to find my G-spot, but when rotating it had to be very careful about that pesky nub. It simply isn't vagina-friendly. It was a turn on, but still no O, and for several minutes after use my insides were sore from that hard plastic nub. So, I would give it a big thumbs-down for internal use; find something softer and smoother.

Overall, I wasn't thrilled with this vibe, which was a disappointment. However, for just 20 bucks, it is worth a shot just to see if you like it, since "different strokes for different folks" and all that. Plus, I would say it is a great stocking stuffer or bachelorette party gift since it is pretty, comes from a great company, and super cheap. Overall, I would say avoid it for yourself and invest in something more expensive, smoother, and made of softer material. Happy humming!

Cheap Ideas for BDSM Play

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How to Deal with Female Ejaculation Messes

After reading the book Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot by Deborah Sundahl, I've been thinking hard about the inherent prejudices against the sexy women who gush, squirt, dribble, or spray. While other women are joyfully getting their groove on any and everywhere, we are discriminated against in the arena of sexual possibility: we can't do it in cars, hotel rooms, beds, couches, sofas, our parents' guest bedroom, or anywhere else covered in fabric or where other people could see the proof of our "playing." *sob* It's a hard life.

So, if having sex for the rest of your life on cold, painful, hard tile floors is not appealing to you (me, either!), I have amassed some resources from internet research, sex toy websites, the wisdom of my girfriends, and years of experience. Here are a few trinkets that should do the trick:

1. The most obvious (and most unappealing) answer is to just have sex in places where it won't matter if you spray and where cleanup is easy. These include the outside (ick!), the shower (I hate standing up for sex!), or hardwood/tile/linoleum floors (ow!).

2. The next, but equally unappealing, suggestion is to change the sheets (and bedcover, and blanket, and pillows, and mattress cover, and mattress if you're like me...). Again, good sex deserves to be rewarded with good cuddling and sleep, not hopping your naked butt out of bed to do laundry!

3. Towels. Lots and lots of towels. Put them under your butt, and have more ready nearby so you can just change them out as you soak through. Of course, the downside is it's hard to aim for one tiny towel during a rompin' good time, it kills the mood to stop and change towels mid-scene, and you can still soak through to the bedding.

4. Aim for the man. Let's face it, I've never met or heard of a guy who was not absolutely thrilled with female orgasm. Most are willing to drink it; though some may balk at that, none mind getting it on their skin. It's easier to wash a man than a sheet.

5. Get creative with your mattresses. One idea is to put two made mattresses on your bed. After sex, throw the top one on the floor and sleep on the warm, dry one underneath. Another idea is to buy a plastic mattress cover. Or, if you don't like creaking your way through sex, buy an inflatable plastic bed that you can just hose off afterward.

6. Buy a commercially-made furniture protector for this very purpose. I found several sex toy stores that carry them. Holistic Wisdom has a waterproof throw for $85. Getinthemood.com sells disposable Luv Liners for $12.99 and washable Luv Linens for $36 (although I feel compelled to mention the site isn't very professionally done and has spelling and grammatical errors at a high school level). A Woman's Touch sells a Liberator's Shag/Satin Thro for $86. Have fun, wash, and reuse.

Review: Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot

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Sex Toy Stores for the BDSM Enthusiast

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