My Turn at Playing Top!!!

Because my Dom agreed that everything he did to me, he would be open to receiving, this last week we've been doing a lot of "getting even"!!! *evil laugh*

I've had a blast! Although I could never be a Domme, I enjoy being the one with the whip in my hands for a change. While my Dom doesn't enjoy it quite so much (*giggle*), he puts up with it wonderfully!

We tried switching just for a little fun. You can learn more from switching than from reading countless articles on BDSM theory, so we tried it out. This gives my Dom a chance to see how it feels to be me, what works and what doesn't, which positions hurt a lot more than he expected, and how tough I really am! For me, it is a chance to be the teacher, showing him, "See how it hurts if you hit too high? But here, this spot feel really good!"

I had a lot of fun with this. I couldn't control my evil laughter the entire time, lol.

For your information, I differentiate between a Top and a Dom/Domme, and a Bottom and Sub. For me, being a top or bottom just means the physical role you play; the top wields the whip, while the bottom receives it. Both partners play as equals, and no power exchange is involved.

A Dom and sub, however, are what I call two people who are exchanging power within a scene. Rather than two equals who just like the sensations of whips and leather, these people add the heightened level of emotional and mental control. The sub relinquishes control and the Dom gains it. People who play as sub and Dom often go beyond the physical realm of BDSM into the wonderful, scary world of emotions, psychology, dependence, control, and power.

I am not a Domme when I switch. I hate being in control! In fact, I am in control enough in our everyday life, thank you very much. I enjoy subbing because it gives me a chance to lay back, give him the reins, and just be completely at his mercy. I don't have to plan, I don't have to think, I don't have to worry about if he is enjoying, no stress and no worries. I love it!

I enjoy switching, but I'd say in those rare moments when we switch, I am a Top. I wield the paddle and the whip, but I do not gain power and he does not relinquish it.

Topping my Dom is immense fun. We've agreed that it is only fair for him to be willing to take as much as he gives. It is also a great learning experience for us to "walk in the other's shoes," so to speak.

The first time I got to play at being a Top, I wanted to show him how much that tiny, innocuous wooden paddle he bought actually hurt! The first time he used it, I ended up screaming and writhing. He was convinced I was just being a wimp, but I knew better.

So we switched. I spanked him, giving him two rounds of Jacob's Ladder, just like he'd given me. To my immense satisfaction, his body went into convulsions, and then before the end he began arching his back and yelling out from the pain. I'd told him so! While the noise from the paddle may not be all that bad, the pain is quite terrible and delicious! And here he was, my fearless Dom, a leader, a military man, a vet of the Iraq war and tough Army guy. Aha! To my great satisfaction, after his 20 swats, he admitted it hurt far more than he'd expected and that I had endured my own 20 with much less noise and writhing than he had.

Score one for the sub being a "toughie"! *gives self a pat on the back*

I enjoyed this so much, I eventually convinced him to let me give him 50 swats. He agreed, and I am sad to say I started out too nicely. I wasn't sure how 50 swats would do, so I gave him the first 30 at a "medium" level. Well, by 50, I was swinging as hard as I could, and he was jerking and making noises of a man in pain, but there was no screaming, no begging, no pleading with me to stop, and no tears. Darn! And I'd really wanted the satisfaction!

Of course, his beautiful, tight bottom was 100% red, and the next day he had two great, blue bruises on his ass. He said it was hard to sit down in some positions, but otherwise he didn't notice the bruising at all, so that was good (I didn't want to hurt him permanently!). Now, several days later, he still has some adorable fading bruises that make me quite proud of myself, but nothing that causes him pain----at least, not as far as I've heard!