Well, my 2nd fisting attempt did not go so much better than the 1st. Sigh.
In case you're wondering, Part 1 of the fisting saga can be found here.
Despite some really good advice from a commentor here on this blog (thanks!) and the women in the Fetlife group Submissive Women, it just didn't work.
We relaxed. We used lube. We went slowly.
Once again, his knuckles, the widest part of his hand, got stuck on my pubic bones. I know, if a baby can fit through..... but it wouldn't! It makes me definitely, definitely fear for childbirth.
Anyway, we used lots and lots of lube, worked up to it from 1 finger to 2, then 3, and so forth.... and we got closer than last time. But when it came down to it, we couldn't do it. It hurt too much, and even when I worked through the pain for seconds at a time, we couldn't do it. Finally, after a good half hour of trying, we gave up.
Still, this failed fisting attempt was not without its merits! It is good couple bonding--quality time, if you will--to try new things together, sexually or otherwise. We had fun talking, working through it together, exploring, going forward, backing up, changing positions, trying again. So I consider it a partial success. Making love isn't about orgasms and hot movie-screen sex, although sometimes I'd like it to be. But in the end, it's about being together, trying new things, and being able to laugh when it doesn't work, roll over and try something else instead, and try again a new day.
2 comments:
If you got further than last time then keep trying, you will get it.
Women who haven't had children take longer to stretch those muscles, they are a lot tighter to begin with.
I'm sure it's still pleasurable getting to the point you are getting to. Did you find you like twisting or gentle thrusting while being stretched (before pain)? It could help you to get more into the bonding if the whole fist isn't the goal at all.
Just a thought.
May I suggest a very good book A Hand in the Bush: the Fine Art of Vaginal Fisting By Deborah Addington. If you do yoga you will find that you have better muscle control and better control of breathing and these are really much more important that "stretching". It is less about stretching than it is about learning to feel and listen to your body and educate it into opening up. Just because we can take a penis, dildo or vibe does not mean we have yet learnt how to open ourselves in body and mind. I realise this all sounds a bit hippy, but when you do finally feel that hand inside you realisation will suddenly hit you. it is a most transcendent experience. That is just this lesbians view point !
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