10/04/2011

If the Woman Initiates...

I've been reading on Taken in Hand and Christian Domestic Discipline websites about how often women find these sites and introduce D/s or DD to their husbands.

In many cases, it's even the majority.

My question is, if the woman initiates the relationship, does that mean it isn't actually being "taken in hand"? (Or at least at first?) Isn't it more like "asking to be taken in hand"?

Is that a good or a bad thing for the relationship to start like that? Can true control be achieved if the woman is always thinking that she had to be the initiator and pursuer of this relationship? Or can true control eventually be assumed by the man?

And what if she then revokes permission or changes her mind? What then?

Just something I'm thinking about.

2 comments:

t1klish said...

I don't think the fact that the woman initiated it would be a problem, as long as the man responds with something like - I'm so glad to hear you say that! Then takes over from there. If the woman has to continue telling him specifically what to do, it would definitely ruin the whole dynamic.

In my situation, my man initiated the dynamic, and I encouraged him to a point, because I have submissive fantasies, but these fantasies are only sexual and do not include anything more than minimal pain. Thankfully he hasn't shown any inclination toward wanting to hurt me.

He's good at taking charge of some things, like, turn over, get on your knees, stuff like that, but then with other things, certain things I want him to do with me, he hasn't even seemed to think up. I had to ask him to do something pretty basic recently that I would assume he wanted to do, and it really took away any charge I wanted to get out of the experience because I had to ask for it.

MrJ said...

Is 'asking for it' not a deep form of submission?