Pregnant?

I haven't been posting because I've spent all my free time obsessively checking and re-checking the internet with posts such as

• very early pregnancy signs
• HGc hormone tests
• implantation cramping
• how long after implantation to take test?
• baby clothes
• etc...

Sadly, Google only knows so much, and it can't tell you much more on the 5th or 6th search than it did on the first.

So I have nothing BDSM-related to talk to you about, because I am thinking only about pregnancy. Am I pregnant? Do I want to be pregnant? Is this too early? What about our plans to move? Where on earth will we put a nursery? Will the cats ever be happy with a new person in the house? What about my job? How will I keep working if I'm sick, tired, and nauseous? Etc., etc. etc.

I've been having some symptoms that could definitely signal early pregnancy, like:

• head rushes
• yeast infection
• sensitivity to smells
• emotional
• easily tired out
• super hungry, then feel full after 5 bites
• light cramping on my left side for a day

But I have had none of the more obvious pregnancy signs, such as

• loss of appetite
• nausea
• sore breasts
• spotting
• bleeding gums
• cramping that lasts for 4-6 days

So that's what I'm doing.... waiting.... waiting.... waiting....

While waiting, I have learned many interesting things about early pregnancy and the hopeful moms who post on early pregnancy forums, such as:

• TTC means "trying to conceive"
• AF means "Aunt Flow" or your period
• conception occurs a day or two after your ovulate, no matter when you had sex
• implantation can occur 6-12 days after you ovulate
• your body won't start making HGC until 6-15 days after implantation occurs
• early pregnancy has a 25-50% chance of ending in miscarriage (that fact TERRIFIES me... how to pregnant women ever relax?!)

The way I see it, there are pros each way. If I'm pregnant, that means:

• a new baby!!!! What a blessing!
• we're not infertile
• my family will be THRILLED when I tell them
• my dad's birthday is coming up at the end of February, so if we ARE pregnant I have the best way to tell them: have him open his gift, and inside just have an infant onsie in camo colors (my dad loves to hunt and fish)

If I'm not pregnant, this means:

• My Dom can keep looking for a job out of state, because moving would still be an option
• My Dom will not be stuck for a few more years at a job he hates
• we won't be paupers in 10 months
• I can keep drinking caffeine and enjoying the occasional vice at a party
• I won't be emotional, sore, moody, sick, or tired for 9 months
• We'll have to try again and I'll have another terrible 14 days of interminable waiting.

I have a doctor's appointment today. I called Planned Parenthood just to see how much their tests are, although I have serious reservations about spending my money at such an anti-Christian, pro-abortion and pro-morning-after-pill place. I probably couldn't have spent my money there in good conscience, but anyway my normal doctor has tests for $50 and PP has them for $110, so it was an easy decision to make, both financially and morally. (Please don't send me hate mail if you love PP.... I'm just saying it doesn't line up with a lot of my beliefs.)

Wish us luck (either way, I guess)!