Rope Bondage Play Last Night

My Dom and I haven't done BDSM in a while. Life gets in the way---work, school (for him), family here for my birthday, getting rid of the cats' fleas. Yes, it always sort of shocks me when the super-sex-blog writers have lives apart from being in scene 24/7, but they do, and so do I.

Last night I was craving some BDSM. I wanted to feel afraid, I wanted to feel excited, I wanted to scream. Strangely, I also wanted to make him scream (he said no).

I'm a talkative bottom, so long as I'm not in sub space (which is rare for me), and last night was no different. I complained and guided him through it: "Nooo, I don't want to be slapped! Kiss me!" We've decided to cut the sex out of BDSM for a while, which I think is good, because BDSM was becoming predictable: rough me up, make me wet, vibrator. Rough me up, make me wet, vibrator. You get the pattern.

I thought it would be a good idea if we took sex out of it, and he agreed. This way we could experiment with more physical sensations--hitting, teasing, slapping.

First, he did one of his favorite things, nipple clamps. He also did one of my favorite things, being tied up. I'm not sure why, but being bound just adds a heightened sense of awesomeness to a scene for me. The more places I'm bound, the better I like it. I think I feel that control has been taken away from me, so I don't even need to try to fight it like the independent, stubborn woman I am. I like the relaxation of lying on the bed, completely immobile, and waiting to see what my Dom will do to me next.

The nipple clamps he bought for me are awesome--they don't cause too much pain, they come in many pretty colors (yay!), and they are hard plastic so they don't permanently damange my skin. I was gasping and twisting and moaning, torn between turned on and incredibly hurt. I asked him to put one on my clit, which felt amazing. It's strange, because on the rest of my vulva, clamps hurt!!!, but right on my clit they just feel good. Yum.

Once we were done, my energy was high and my adrenaline was pumping. I begged him to let me spank him. I wanted one of us to scream, and I'm not a screamer. But my Dom has no desire really to switch, so he said no. :( Well, I wanted one of us to scream, so I asked him to take me into our guest bedroom (that bed has a headboard) and tie me up and make me scream.

I settled comfortably on the bed and asked for my gag. I love my ball gag---like bondage, it makes me feel so much more helpless and into a scene. Without it, I still have the power of speech: I can talk, control, command, beg, whine, and basically attempt to control the scene. But once the gag is in, my power of speech is lost. I feel (and therefore look) much more helpless. I can bite down on the ball, which helps me deal with more pain, and I can only whimper and scream to communicate. In addition, the ball gag forces my mouth open, so when I'm facedown I get salivia all over the bed---it's terribly humiliating and hot.

Then my Dom tied me up. He was just playing with the rope, but I was super happy because this was the first time we'd done any real rope bondage beyond hands and ankles! Before I knew it, my whole body was covered with rope. Each wrist was tied to an ankle, rope was going up my neck and over my shoulders, around my stomach, into a V down my vulva and snugly rubbing my bottom. I was held fast in a fetal position with my gag on, and we were ready for play.

I'd never been tied up like that before, but I loved it. Sure, it was uncomfortable at times, and required patience as my Dom tied me up, but it was so nice. It makes me think I might enjoy Shibari, a decorative type of Japanese art bondage often used in BDSM. In that position, I was helpless to move or squirm away as he hit me; I could do nothing as he roughly picked me up and put me in whatever position he wanted me; and my Dom could grab one of the ropes and force me into a certain position for better aim at a certain body part.

He started out with some light slaps with our slapper. I am pretty afraid of the slapper because hard slaps hurt a TON, but I enjoy light and medium slaps. They increase my skin's sensitivity to touch and keep me totally focused on what's happening to me. After a while, he started hitting me harder and I started whimpering, then shrieking, through the gag. Then he put the slapper down and brought out a leather belt. One of the great things my Dom does during scenes is using lack of light and my glasses to make sure I can never see what's coming next til it's right in front of my face. This element of surprise makes it much more deliciously frightening for me! My eyes got huge and he laughed down at me, saying, "Do you have any idea how pitiful you look?" He used the belt some to scare me, but it never really hurt too much.

My Dom roughly wrestled me into several positions. I loved the helplessness! (Of course, I say this now, but at the time I was just scared.) He put me on my stomach and thrust into my raised buttocks through his boxers, talking dirty to me as he did. It was an incredible turn on! A few times he even rolled my bound body right to the edge of the bed. I screamed in so much terror that at one point he stopped the scene because he thought he'd pulled a rope too hard and hurt me. When he asked if he'd hurt me, I simply shook my head and pointed in terror to the edge of the bed. It was so scary to be bound like that in the fetal position, knowing if he let me fall I'd be completely helpless to protect myself as I fell! Several times he pulled me past the point where gravity should have taken over, letting nothing keep me from falling but his body holding me up. It scared me to death!

Once we were done with that, my right ankle was starting to really hurt from the ropes and being pulled on so much, but I was loving the scene. I love the challenge of wondering if he'll be able to make me scream.

He put me on my stomach, bottom up, took off the ball gag, and started to use the wooden paddle. But he went too fast and too high up (near the tailbone hurts much more than near the thighs!) and I couldn't take it. I think if he'd gone slowly and steadily, letting the pain build up, I could have screamed, but this was too fast. Plus, my gag was out and I could talk again; for some reason, this lowers my tolerance since I start to concentrate on talking myself out of the beating rather than just on enduring it. I started shrieking for him to stop and I safeworded. We were done!

Of course, by then my right ankle was bruised and killing me. I'm not sure if it was too tight or just got yanked around too much, but he quickly untied me while I laid still and whimpered for him to be careful of my ankle. When we were done, he kissed my ankle and we had a shower.

After a scene like that, I always love the rope burns that stay on my wrists and ankles for a while after the scene. I feel so sexy, looking down at them and feeling a little bit owned. I also loved being tied up so much, and am really looking forward to future bondage sessions that go beyond just wrists and ankles--though perhaps with padded cuffs on my ankles might be a good idea next time! I'm hoping we can try a similar scene again soon (tonight???? hmmm....) so we can see if slow, steady spanks can get me to my limit and make me scream. Yummm....

I'm working on a series of blogs about leadership for tops in BDSM, so please be patient as I continue working on those posts! Once I've finished the series, I'll post them all at once, so check back soon! Til then, adieu!