I lie and wait

I lie and wait for the triple header I know is coming, 

That I know I deserve after mentioning threesomes and reading erotica and hitting him 

Am I in for a bad night? 

He has trained me somehow,

Changed me somehow, 

Made me this woman who lies in bed awaiting her triple fucking, asking for it, needing it

Needing the connection,

The atonement for sins past 

Waiting to be overcome,

Needing to be reminded who's boss 

The baseball game captures his attention a few moments more

I'm tingling, nervous 

Still aching from the welt his hand left on me when I hit him--

He already marked me

What punishment is in store? 

The game is almost over. 

Husband Punishes Wife Without Spanking

There is a serious lack of information on any sort of husband-led relationship that includes disciplines without spanking. Seriously, every time you type it in, whether you're looking for tips or support or erotic or that damn porn that always creeps up begging for clicks, because heaven forbid you want information not found in highly unrealistic pornography.

We have a relationship with punishment and domination without spanking. In fact, I haven't been spanked in years. Not only because I've been so good. Also because that's not the way our D/s works.

"Why Anal Hurts" Review

In his essay "Why Anal Hurts" the 40-year-old author is quick to point out that he advocates painful sexual submission, not sexual abuse or rape. However, he still has ideas most feminists would hate. His whole idea is that men were made to penetrate and dominate, and women were made to submit and receive penetration. From an evolutionary point of view, he's right, and he uses this to justify a man training and hurting a woman with whom he is in a committed relationship:

Anal sex, most sexual acts in fact, should be painful, degrading, humiliating, or some combination of the three for a woman. The reason for that is quite simple: When something pleases you, you are not submitting to it. You are not demonstrating to your man that his protection, shelter, and provision are worthwhile to you. You are not proving that, of the 110 million women in America of potential breeding age, he made the right choice in selecting you to be bound to for the rest of his life.

The truth is, my Dom would probably agree: most sexual acts should be painful, degrading, or humiliating. For him, it's not about showing gratitude for choosing me, it's about submitting as God calls me to and repaying him for taking care of me in our lives.

This explains another reason why anal sex must brutalize and torture your woman. For her entire life—at least as long as you have been hearing that you are a second-class citizen because of your cock—your little slut has been hearing that she’s the one with all the power and control in any and every sexual relationship because of her pussy.

Strongly put, but definitely something my Dom would also agree with. He loves to hurt and bruise me on the inside. He strives to never harm me, but to bruise.  He likes to go wild on top of me and know I am helpless to stop him. He loves to finger me as I try vainly to pull his hand away. And he does believe that too many women today are not dominated in the bedroom, and too many men today are raised to be wusses and wimps. In that, I can agree with him.

The essay is a bit pompous and self-congratulatory, but the author's message is valuable and I believe the article is definitely worth a read.

In the dark of the night

Darkness fall. A soft rain patters outside. 

He takes me, sharp pain, too much--I squirm and gasp and try to move away, 

But his hands are inexorable

Drawing me to him

Shuddering, tears threaten

The sharp pain that gives way to the dull ache that brings shameful convulsions--

Involuntary, not building but crashing through

How from the depths of my body pleasure can be ripped from me with the hands of a thief

 How the pain is almost more than I can bear but the endorphins race through me

And I shudder, 

and I surrender, 

and I give.

Anal + TIH

While I consider our relationship to fall within the umbrella of Taken in Hand (TIH) relationships, I think for us, anal sex has evolved to take the place of spanking. Don't get me wrong, at the beginning spanking was something we both enjoyed, but it was short-lived and he seems to gravitate the last 8-12 months toward anal domination.

Why?

An excellent question. He says he enjoys it because it's a way to dominate me, totally and utterly. I hate it. It's like Doule's experience, which has regrettably been deleted, or this blogger's depictions of anal orgasms.

Maybe it's for many reasons. I don't know everything that goes on in his head, and he is regrettably close-lipped during sex. But I know he likes to control me. Likes how I hate it. Likes how I cry or fight or beg or go limp. Likes how I look as I arch under him. Likes how I clench down on him when he reaches around and pinches my nipples. Likes how I cry out as he rips pleasures out of me. Likes how humiliated I become. Likes how I collapse before him. He tells me these things that he likes, sometimes, as he rides me and I am helpless beneath him.

It's not the physical that causes the orgasm, it's the mental. The subordination. The pain, the confusion, the pleasure. The torture, the humiliation, the father figure, the lord, the master, the boss, the chieftain, the priest. The shuddering submission and the dark enveloping pleasure of sub space.

For us, it's not maintenance spankings or punishment spanking sessions. It's maintenance anal and anal rape as a punishment. It affects me in a deeper, more personal way than spanking does. The pain is more broad and dull, less sharp, more bearable, more pleasurable. The anger spanking brings in me goes away as I fight and am conquered, irrevocably, irretrievably. He invades me; he conquers me; it is done. There is no more to be done but to submit. From inside, grasping my hair in rough handfuls, he controls me as reins do a horse, riding me to his climax even when I weep and collapse from the pain.


Yet it's all the same message as TIH. The man is in charge, the man holds the reins. The woman submits to his will, to his rules, to his specifications, and if she does not she can expect to be punished. Many TIH couples use spanking as a punishment, but not all. Right now, we do not. But my bottom is still punished. Oh, yes it is.

My stomach hurts

He rapes me, he hurts me, he takes me three ways then calls me names. When he is done I am crying dry tears and he whispers I love you. 

I shiver, I huddle, I sigh. God is his master. He is mine.