5/12/2012

Am I a Reflection?

I was reading Storm'y blog today, and in it her Dom/husband said:

She's a reflection on me, she's part of me, and we both want to hold ourselves and each other to high standards as we go about our lives.
And then I think, "Am I a reflection of you?"

Does my husband see me as a reflection of himself? Sometimes I really wonder this.

I certainly see him as a reflection of me. I feel embarrassed when he does foolish things, proud when he does great things. I feel that to society, as well as to our family and friends, his choices and decisions mirror back onto me. I chose this man, his actions seem to say of me. Of all the men in the world, I chose this one to join my life to. What do you think of my choice?

Since husband and wife are one body, I think there is a religious or spiritual reasoning behind us being reflections of one another as well.

But I am not sure if he feels this way about me. When I do something great, he is happy and proud, but I think more for me than seeing it as a reflection on him, a reflection on his choices in a life mate, a reflection of his abilities and strengths as a leader. When I do something bad or wrong, rather than feeling embarrassed or seeing my faults as a reflection of his skills as a leader, I think he just feels bad for me.

This is not the way I see it.

I like the way Stormy's husband sees her, the way I think many DD and D/s husbands see their mates. The sub is a reflection of the Dom-- a reflection of his choices. A reflection of his ability to make sound decisions. And a reflection of his leadership capabilities.

The book Liberated by Submission made the point that, if a woman has turned from a lovely, positive young fiancée to a nagging, critical, harping wife, she has done so under the man's leadership. Rather than guiding her into safe, positive, spiritually enriching waters, he has provided poor guidance or, just as bad, no guidance at all.

Am I a reflection of you? Do you even care what I do or say? How it reflects on you?

Am I your reflection?

1 comment:

t1klish said...

You know what they say, you're judged by the company you keep.