3/20/2009

Changes in Female Ejaculation

While Female Ejaculation (FE) can be hot, it can also be embarrassing. Even women who are used to ejaculating and soaking the sheets can find changes in the look, texture, smell, and taste of their ejaculate. Why? How? What exactly is FE?

I think many websites have already done a good job proving FE is not urine. Some books and sites will try to make it seem like a woman has to ejaculate during sex or she's not having fun, or is missing out on some essential part of her "womanhood," or some such nonsense. Don't believe a word of it! Sex is good if you and your mate are bonding and having a good time, whether or not one or either or neither or both of you comes, whether you ejaculate, whether you get wet, or whether you just roll around in bed and enjoy each other. The point of sex is communion, not orgasm.

But FE is definitely a popular topic. And it is undeniably fun. I've never met a man who didn't think it was totally awesome and hot. For women, it feels good as well. So a little more info on FE can't hurt... it is just one more tool to add to our toolbox of sexual experiences.

FE is often achieved by stimulating the G-spot (a fancy name for the urethral sponge), but can also come from clitoral stimulation or just from being really aroused. (I don't care what the scientists tell you, I've had it happen!) No matter how you achieve it, the end result is fluid-- it can dribble out in small amounts or squirt out for several feet (that's why they call it "gushing"!).

Is FE urine? No. However, it can have traces of urea in it. Ejaculate comes from the kidney, bladder, and Skene's gland (female prostrate) and is more watery and slick than urine. It tends to be more acidic than either urine or natural female lubricant like your body makes when you get aroused; this is because it contains higher levels of acid phosphatase. FE also contains glucose/sugar. There may be small amounts of urine in the ejaculate at times, which is why sometimes you will get a slight smell of urine; however, you can tell by the smell, feel, and color that it is not urine.

Is FE the same as an orgasm? No. FE can come with an orgasm, or it can come alone, or the orgasm can occur alone. They can (and will!) happen together, often making a more intense orgasm, but they can also happen separately. Also, women can experience many, many kinds of orgasms, and ejaculating is just one type of the many sexual experiences we can enjoy.

Can you pee and ejaculate at the same time? Yep! This is an unfortunate fact of ejaculation. Men cannot urinate and ejaculate at the same time, but we females can. Since they both come from the bladder and urethra, sometimes you will ejaculate a mix of both, or simply emit urine. There is no way to control which one comes out of your urethra, so the best idea is to use the restroom before you have sex. Also, urine is sterile, and can be easily washed out of sheets and blankets and off hands and faces, so I wouldn't worry about it.

What does FE smell like? The smell varies, but it is often a sweeter smell than urine. I've heard it described as "light", "flowery", and "sweet." It is a distinctly feminine smell that most men adore! Some husbands say their wives' ejaculate smells very similar to the natural lubricants secreted during arousal.

Can FE change in smell, color, and taste? Yes, your ejaculate can change. Just like male ejaculate, urine, and vaginal mucus, ejaculate depends on what you've been eating and drinking. How hydrated you are, the foods you've been eating, and the time of month in your cycle can all affect the smell, color, and taste of FE. Sometimes ejaculate has a stronger smell than other times. Ejaculate is often clear, slick, and watery, but it can also be white, cloudy, or yellowish. Sometimes it can have a salty or bitter flavor, depending on your food and beverage consumption.

How much can a woman ejaculate? From what I've read, many doctors say a woman can ejaculate anything from just a few teaspoons to up to two cups. Of course, when they say "up to two cups," what they mean is that is all they have scientifically observed women ejaculating in their studies. Of course, most of us haven't participated in these studies where doctors measure your ejaculate. If my sheets (and the stories of some girl friends!) are any indication, some women gush far more than 2 cups!

Can FE dehydrate you? You betcha! After gushing loads of water and panting, your body is going to be dehydrated. Drinking lots of water afterward is the best way to fix this. I wouldn't drink water beforehand or you might have to get up and run to the bathroom in the middle.

Can I stop ejaculation from happening? Absolutely! In fact, many women do. When your partner is stroking the top of your vaginal wall (G-spot), he is actually stimulating your urethral sponge. Many times the urge to pee comes right before a gush of fluid; if you clamp down with your PC muscles, you will force the fluid backwards into your bladder. You won't ejaculate, but will release the ejaculate later with your urine. Some studies show that this retrograde ejaculation can actually lead to more bladder infections in women, so I wouldn't try it.

What are the benefits of ejaculation? Well, not every woman ejacualtes, and FE is certainly not required to have awesome, mind-blowing sex! But there are some benefits to ejaculating now and again. One, mentioned above, is that it keeps you from forcing the fluid into your bladder and developing infections. Another is that it is fun. It feels good for your lover on his hand or penis. And it feels good for you! Even if not accompanied by an orgasm, the gush of warm liquid bursting from your body gives an awesome physical release and can feel freeing and fantastic.

What about my sheets?!?!?!? Ah, yes, always a problem! FE can come in tiny amounts, just dribbling out, but some women can squirt and gush huge amounts! Personally, I think it's fun; the bigger I am able to gush, the better it feels. However, your sheets and towels are an issue. Ejaculate can soak right through them, through egg-foam toppers to the mattress. You have a few options here: water-proof blankets in baby/toddler stores, invest in lots of cheap towels and keep a stack by the bed for quick changing, buy a specialized fluid-proof throw available in many online sex stores, or put on some plastic sheets. Yes, it means more laundry, but personally I've never had a boy complain, and when I realize they're happy, I'm happy, too!

Whether or not you learn to ejaculate doesn't matter. How much you ejaculate or when it happens or how it smells or whether there is urine in it don't matter. If you are having fun, enjoying your sex life, and leaving satisfied, you've had good sex. Enjoy!

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